“Summer or welcome to the ninth circle of hell!” This is the message chosen to display, on the occasion of the recent summer solstice, a well-known restaurant in the French Quarter of New Orleans – known for its sarcastic remarks related to the news, written each week at the haste on a piece of paper that looks like it’s been ripped straight from a school notebook, then somehow taped to a shop window adorned with red and white gingham curtains. And even Dante wouldn’t find fault with that – of course I’m not talking about the curtains reflecting questionable taste in interior decoration, but about the warmth.
Because yes, if here we are in the very last circle of hell, after a long descent to the center of the Earth, it is for a reason: it is a heat that will make you “sweat like a sinner in a church” (expression made in southern United States – all found, right?). So, are you ready to break out the SPF 70 sunscreen and make an incursion into the hellish Louisiana summer? I want to make it clear: in the event of a heat stroke, I decline all responsibility.
Winter or Paradise Lost
Winter or summer? It’s time to give you a little more context. In New Orleans, there are – more or less, I’m no meteorologist either, folks – two seasons, which we’ll call, for convenience, “winter” and “summer,” even though they don’t match. necessarily in the image we have of it in France (sorry to disappoint you, but snowflakes and other snowmen will not be on the program). And in New Orleans, we are resolutely team winter. But then why? The tropical season (summer) runs from mid-May to mid-October, condemning us to a long purgatory of five months – yes, it seems endless when it’s 40°C every day. The arrival of winter is therefore expected like the messiah.
And you will probably have understood it: the use of the word “winter” here is slightly abusive. I’m talking about a season during which the temperature is between 15 and 25°C, all punctuated by a cloudless blue sky, conducive to outdoor activities and long evenings on the terrace. But then, can it be cold in New Orleans? Yes it’s possible. If it’s -30°C at our friends in Minnesota (hello), we will also have a “cold” wave (well, it will be 5°C during the day for two days). The perfect opportunity to take out your most beautiful coats? The people of New Orleans are not waiting: we drop below the symbolic bar of 20°C and now knit sweaters and other jackets are appearing. You’ll see when you too have spent five months in summer hell – stew option.
Infernal heat and oppressive humidity
The bright winter has given way to the dark summer – and so here we are in the ninth circle of hell (without much transition period – good-bye spring and fall). And a first observation is obvious: it’s hot (in case you haven’t understood it yet). You look at the weather and you see that it is the same over and over again: it fluctuates between 30 and 35°C. Tolerable, you will tell me. But make no mistake: an invisible and treacherous force is at work, complicating many things (we are in hell, after all). I named humidity.
Unknown element
And this humidity, constantly present from May to October, can easily add ten degrees to the thermometer: 30°C announced, 40°C felt. All in an atmosphere worthy of a giant tropical greenhouse, which Louisianans like to call the perfect hundred : 100°F (38°C) for 100% humidity. And get ready to do laundry because the t-shirts stuck to the skin will be in the game (and no, I’m not talking about a wet t-shirt contest, a little respect all the same). Only positive point (again according to our Louisiana friends): your skin will be better hydrated and eternal youth awaits you (despite an outrageous tan). Have we sold our soul to the devil? I promise, I’ll give you a beauty point in twenty years.
Storms, hurricanes and other apocalypses
Little memories of your favorite SVT classes: the hot and humid air likes to rise towards the sky (if only it could take off once and for all and never come back) and condenses on contact with the air more cool located at altitude, forming charming little clouds. And so rain and thunderstorms. During the tropical season, count about one thunderstorm per day. Yes, yes, per day. To give you an idea, the annual rainfall is three times higher in New Orleans than in Paris. But no drizzle here. We are talking about real deluges, thunder and lightning in support. And it can fall in an hour what it would fall in three months in Los Angeles. Classic pattern: it is 5 p.m., a storm erupts for thirty minutes, the atmosphere cools slightly, then the sun inexorably rises again. Automatic watering system for lush vegetation? Everything seems to indicate it.
And thunderstorms sometimes turn into storms of another kind: hurricanes – which appear in late summer, when the air is warmest (they begin to form when the surface of the sea reaches 27°C). And if they do not affect us every year (fortunately), climate change precipitates their formation and their intensity. A simple tropical storm can thus turn into a category 5 hurricane much more quickly than before. And let’s just say that experiencing a hurricane is not a pleasant experience (if you want to know more, I invite you to (re)read one of my previous articles here). So, see you in October?