In the gloom of the pandemic, our confinements with variable geometry and conditions – and the number of deaths which, in Quebec, reached alarming heights -, holes in the clouds, you have to work very hard to find them.
Sometimes, they show up by surprise, by chance, and hold our hearts for a long time.
This morning, reading my newspapers with Hi hello! accompanying the TV, the face and words of Caroline Gauthier – she was in an interview with Gino Chouinard – grabbed me with a sharp blow.
Impossible to come out unscathed.
I admit that I did not know her before, but, at the same time, it was as if I had known her all my life, while hers will already end, this Sunday, by their own choice to use physician-assisted dying.
At 35, Caroline Gauthier has been suffering from incurable breast cancer for years. Her life, for her, is simply no longer one.
Hence her choice to leave this world on Sunday evening, surrounded by the love of her loved ones.
A very personal choice, like other choices, at the end of life, are also just as possible and preferable for others.
Caroline Gauthier is, among other things, a young comedian, also known for her 2018 tour, very aptly named Fuck cancer, I’m doing improv.
Seeing and listening to her this morning, so serene about her decision – a choice that belongs to her alone – her courage literally lit up the room.
When Mr. Chouinard asked her how she felt, her answer was simple and precise: “I feel free inside. I have no weight on my shoulders. I am a liberated woman. ”
And his reflection on life? he asked her.
Here too, Caroline Gauthier went straight to the point. Or do what makes us happy before it’s too late:
“I thought about it. What message can I leave? My reflection on life, on mine, is: do it. So I should have done things long before, instead of pushing them away. So I wish everyone would say good, well, okay, I wanna do that, go, I do it. You never know when, in the end, it will stop. “
On Sunday, his relatives will accompany him on his final journey. We will also surely be many to do so in spirit and in heart.
Dear Caroline Gauthier, thank you for existing. Thank you for your immense lesson in courage.
Thank you for the inspiration of life that you offer so generously to all those who, by chance or not, have had the privilege of hearing from you.