A Life of Early Marriage, Motherhood, and Widowhood: Surviving Adversity Before 19

A girl Sold Into Marriage At 12 Shares Her Story Of Resilience

August 18, 2025, 7:00 AM
Updated August 18, 2025, 8:14 AM

The Practice Of Child Marriage Remains Alarmingly Prevalent Globally.
(Image: Getty)

Mina Khanoom‘s Life, Rooted In The Traditional Communities Of Iran, Serves As A stark reminder Of The Continuing Reality Of Child Marriage.Her Story, Unveiled In Tara Kangarlou’s Book, “The Heartbeat of Iran,” illuminates The Struggles Faced By Ordinary Citizens Within The Nation.

At The Age Of Twelve, Mina Was Forced Into marriage With A Man Thirty Years Her Senior. While Such A Practice Appears Unthinkable in Many Parts Of The World, It Continues To Occur Across Regions Including The middle East, Asia, And Africa.

“My Parents Were Illiterate And Didn’t Know Any Better,” Mina Explained. “Back Then, Many Poor And Uneducated Families Would Marry Their Daughters At That Age.”

According To Recent Data,An Estimated 700 Million Women Worldwide Were Married As Children,As Reported By The express.This Crisis Isn’t Confined To Developing Countries.

In The united States, While The Legal Marriage Age Is generally 18, Exceptions Exist Permitting Marriage With Parental Consent And Judicial Approval. As of 2025, Child Marriage Remains Legal In 34 States, While Only 16 States Have Outlawed It Without Exception.

Country	Legal Minimum Marriage Age
South Sudan	No Legal Minimum
Saudi Arabia	No Legal Minimum
Equatorial Guinea	No Legal Minimum
Gambia	No Legal Minimum
Somalia	No Legal Minimum
Yemen	No Legal Minimum
iran	13 (Girls), 15 (Boys)
United States	18 (Varies by State)

Mina Recounted Her Early Experiences: “I Was Scared Of Him.” As A Child, Her Husband Would Enter Her Room After She Fell Asleep. At Fourteen, She Became Pregnant.

“One Day I Felt Something Moving In My Stomach, And I Started Crying And Ran To My Husband’s Aunt. I Was Screaming, ‘abji Shirin, Abji Shirin (meaning sister in Farsi), A Mouse Has Gone Into My Stomach. See, It’s Moving.'”

four Years Later, She Gave Birth To Her Second Son.Tragedy Struck When Mina Was Just Nineteen, With Her Husband’s Death In A Car Accident, Leaving Her A Widow. she Was Left Alone To Care For Her Children, Receiving No Support From Family.

“I Don’t Know What It Was, But I’ve Always Had Hope,” She Shared. “I Swear To God, Sometimes I think Ten Grown Men Could Not Have Survived My Life-But Somehow I Did, And I Think It Was All As Of My Never-Ending Belief In The Power Of Hope.”

Mina Faced Numerous Opportunities For Remarriage, But Nearly All Would Have Meant Separating From Her Sons. Many Prospective Husbands Saw Her Children As Burdens.

“Sure, My Life Could Have Become Better, But Almost All The Men Who Wanted To Marry Me Were forcing Me To Choose Between Marrying Them Or Keeping My Boys,” She Said.

Widowed And Without Formal Education, Mina Sought Employment To Support Her Family.”My Boys Were My Life; They Were My Everything. All I Wanted For Them Was To Live A Good Life.”

During The iran-Iraq war, Mina Secured A Position At A Military Hospital, Undertaking Various Tasks From Patient Care To Cleaning.After The Conflict, she Continued Working At The Hospital While Also Providing Childcare In Affluent Tehran Neighborhoods.

Though Her Dream Of Providing Her Sons With A University Education Remained Unfulfilled, Her Determination Provided Them With Opportunities.Her Sons Are Now Grown Men, Employed In Iran.

“I Still Think I Can Learn Things And Educate Myself, “She Said. “My Dream Is To Leave Iran And maybe Live In Another Country. There Is Still So Much I Can Do, So Much I Haven’t Done.”

understanding The Global Impact Of Child Marriage

Child Marriage Is A Complex Global issue With Deep-Rooted Societal And Economic Factors. Poverty, Lack Of Education, and Gender Inequality Are Major Drivers.The Consequences Are Devastating, leading To Health Problems, Limited Educational Opportunities, And Reduced Agency For Girls.

Recent Studies By UNICEF Indicate That Rates Of Child Marriage Have Been Plateauing, But Progress Is Slow, Especially In Sub-Saharan Africa.International Organizations Are Working To Raise Awareness, Empower Girls, And Advocate For Legal Reforms. The COVID-19 Pandemic Has Also Exacerbated The risk, With School Closures And Economic Hardships Increasing Vulnerability.

Frequently Asked Questions About Child Marriage

1. What is Child Marriage?

   Child Marriage is A Marriage Involving A Person Under The Age Of 18. It Is A Violation Of Human Rights And Hinders The Progress Of Children.

2. why Does Child Marriage Still Exist?

   Poverty, Cultural Traditions, And Lack Of Education Are Primary Drivers Of Child Marriage. In Some Regions, It Is Seen As A Way To Protect Girls From Social Stigma Or Economic Hardship.

3. What Are The Consequences Of child Marriage?

   Child Marriage Can Led To A Range Of Negative Consequences, Including Health Problems (Such As Early pregnancy Complications), Limited Educational Opportunities, And Increased Risk Of Violence.

4. What Is Being Done To End child Marriage?

   International Organizations, Governments, And NGOs Are Working To Raise Awareness, Empower Girls, Enforce Laws, And Provide Support To Affected Individuals.

5. What Can Individuals Do To Help?

   Supporting Organizations Working To End Child marriage, Advocating For Policy Changes, And Raising Awareness Within your Community Are All Effective Ways To Contribute.

What are your thoughts on the resilience demonstrated by Mina Khanoom in the face of such adversity? Do you believe more can be done to combat the issue of child marriage globally?

How did strong family networks and community solidarity mitigate the challenges faced by young widows historically?

The Past Context of Young Marriage & motherhood

Historically, particularly before the 20th century, early marriage was commonplace across many cultures. Driven by economic necessity, social pressures, and limited opportunities for women, girls as young as 12 or 13 where often wed. This practice wasn’t simply about romance; it was frequently a transaction securing family alliances, property rights, or economic stability. Consequently, early motherhood was almost unavoidable. Understanding this historical backdrop is crucial when examining the experiences of women facing widowhood at such a young age. Factors contributing to this included:

High infant and maternal mortality rates.

Prevalence of infectious diseases.

Perilous working conditions for men.

Limited access to healthcare.

The Realities of Early Marriage and its Impact

Entering marriage before emotional and physical maturity has profound consequences. Teen marriage often meant relinquishing education, limiting career prospects, and facing societal expectations far beyond a young girl’s capacity. The power dynamics within these marriages were often unequal, leaving young wives vulnerable to abuse and control.

Educational Disruption: Girls forced into early marriage almost universally miss out on formal education, perpetuating cycles of poverty.

Health Risks: Young bodies are not fully developed for childbirth, leading to increased risks of complications during pregnancy and delivery, including obstetric fistula and maternal mortality.

Social Isolation: Early wives are often cut off from thier families and peer groups, leading to loneliness and a lack of social support.

Economic Dependence: without education or skills, young widows are often left with no means of supporting themselves or their children.

Navigating the Trauma of Young Widowhood

The loss of a spouse is devastating at any age, but for a young woman who has also experienced early marriage and motherhood, the trauma is compounded.Young widowhood presented unique challenges: societal stigma, economic hardship, and the overwhelming duty of raising children alone.

Societal Stigma & Reintegration

Widows, particularly young ones, often faced intense social stigma. They were frequently blamed for their husband’s death, ostracized by their communities, and denied basic rights. Reintegration into society was incredibly tough, and many were forced to live on the margins. The term “bereavement” doesn’t fully capture the layered grief experienced by these women.

Economic Survival Strategies

Without a husband’s income,young widows had to find ways to support themselves and their children. Options were limited, often involving:

1. Remarriage: Sometimes, families pressured widows to remarry quickly, even to older men, to ensure financial security. This wasn’t always a choice, but a necessity.
2. Manual Labour: Many took on physically demanding jobs, such as farming, weaving, or domestic service.
3. Begging/Charity: In extreme cases, widows were forced to rely on begging or charity to survive.
4. Skill-Based Trades: Some, with prior training or support, were able to establish small businesses or practice a trade.

The emotional and Psychological Toll

The emotional and psychological impact of early marriage, motherhood, and widowhood is immense. Post-traumatic stress, depression, and anxiety were common, yet frequently enough went untreated due to a lack of access to mental health care. The constant stress of survival and the weight of responsibility took a heavy toll on their well-being.

Case Study: Widowhood in 19th Century rural England

Historical records from 19th-century rural England reveal numerous cases of women widowed before the age of 20. Parish records often detail the struggles of these women to secure poor relief, find employment, and care for their children. For example, the case of Mary Smith, widowed at 17 after her husband died in a mining accident, illustrates the harsh realities. She was forced to work as a laundress to support her two young children, facing constant hardship and social prejudice. These records demonstrate that this wasn’t an isolated phenomenon, but a widespread social issue.

Resilience and Coping Mechanisms

despite the immense adversity, many young widows demonstrated remarkable resilience. They developed coping mechanisms to survive, including:

Strong Family Networks: Support from mothers, sisters, and other female relatives was crucial.

Community Solidarity: In certain specific cases, communities rallied around widows, providing assistance and support.

Religious Faith: Religion frequently enough provided solace and a sense of purpose.

Resourcefulness and Determination: The sheer determination to provide for their children fueled their efforts to overcome obstacles.

Modern Parallels & Ongoing Challenges

While child marriage is declining globally, it still persists in many parts of the world, particularly in developing countries. The challenges faced by young brides and widows today are similar to those of the past: lack of education, economic dependence, social stigma, and limited access to healthcare. Conflict zones and humanitarian crises exacerbate these vulnerabilities, increasing the risk of early marriage and widow