Years of love passed by the girl, Sumaya, with the young Ibrahim, for a very long time, but their dream finally came true, and the time for the wedding took place, despite the fact that Sumaya’s family did not agree to her marriage to Ibrahim, who is unemployed, who does not have an independent apartment to accommodate him with his bride.
Sumaya, who is 23 years old, rebelled against the desire of her family, and chose love over her family, and she was counting the days and nights to be next to Ibrahim, who had showered her with his love during the past years, and lavished her with words of love and pampering, and woven for her from imagination the scheme of their lives that they would live after marriage.
Because of the love between them, Sumaya did not think that Ibrahim would change one day, and she was convinced in herself that after marriage she would live with him a life of bliss as he promised, and build with him the family she had always dreamed of.
The beginning of the end Somaya and Ibrahim finally got attached, and hours after the noisy wedding, the newlyweds went to Ibrahim’s mother’s apartment because he did not have an independent apartment, they were overwhelmed with joy despite the fatigue and hardship of the wedding ceremony.
The newlyweds arrived in the bedroom, and Sumaya was exhausted due to the exhausting wedding ceremony, she wanted to rest and go to sleep, but the groom Ibrahim refused that and insisted on deflowering her that night, justifying that he misses her and cannot wait. Reluctantly, Sumaya agreed, and it was only a few minutes and her life turned into hell, and it was the beginning of the end.
The virginity of the bride Ibrahim entered his bride Sumaya, but his face suddenly changed, and the expressions of adoration and love disappeared, and he told her in a way that is not without suspicion and doubt: There are no blood spots. Sumaya continues describing this situation by saying: “At that moment, Ibrahim’s looks at me were like daggers stuck in my chest, he killed me with them without knowing, he did not even try to talk to me, and left me neglected as if I was accused and waiting for my trial.”
She says: “We had discussed many things before marriage, even about the wedding night, which was supposed to be the happiest night for us. It seemed to me that we knew many things about each other, but it all went to the wind after the lack of a sign of what they call virginity.”
Sumaya went with her husband the next day to the gynecologist, who examined her and assured them that her membrane is thick and will not completely disappear except with her first natural birth. Although happiness returned to Ibrahim, and a smile smiled on his lips, it was too late, the young woman made up her mind, and decided to ask for a divorce as soon as possible.
And she talks about her waiting for some time to file for divorce by saying: “My husband became a stranger to me, I was afraid that he would join what society might say about my virginity. I no longer predicted what he might do. Everything became expected. There is no security for me from him over my life after that.”
And she adds, “I really don’t know how to describe my condition and my feelings towards him after that night, but I could not bear to live with him after I reduced all my qualities and abilities to a membrane that is of no importance to me. In the end, I am a human and not just a fleshy membrane.”
Sumaya’s psychological condition has worsened since then, as she did not want to receive anyone or go anywhere. She felt as if she was playing the role of a traditional wife who has no power except with his consent, according to her. Somaya did not have sex with him during three months except a few times and without her desire, and she says: “When he was sleeping with me, I was feeling alienated, I did not want him, and I did not feel anything, because my passion had died that night, I was waiting for him to finish his mission and leave me Having sex with him made me feel prostitute because it was not out of love, but from a duty imposed on me.” In the face of the wind, Sumaya declared to her husband that she did not want to continue with him, after several months had passed, and she told him about her irreversible decision because, according to her, she no longer believes in her life with him, and that there is no longer love or passion for him after the experience of the first night, and she told him about He doubted her and how “insensitive” he was on that night, insulting her and detracting from her dignity.
Somaya confirms: “He was shocked by what I said, because he considers it his right as a man to know that his wife has not had sex with anyone before him, and that he will not divorce me as long as I live, and I have to make sense of my rebellious behavior because the result is remorse.” And she continues: “Our society has double standards. Men’s sexual adventures are acceptable and even admirable. As for women, they are ostracized and punished with murder. My husband, who I left, is one of them. He laughs as he talks about a previous sexual adventure between friends and gets angry if you just make a joke on a joke.” Somaya left Syria last June for Europe after her family refused to support the idea of her divorce because they considered the reason to be “trivial and absurd.”