How to get out of sexual mental burden?

2024-03-15 11:17:36

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In our podcast “Minute Papillon!” », welcome to our Friday meeting entitled “Everything Explains”, which you can listen to on Apple podcast or Spotify, don’t hesitate to subscribe for free!

Think about washing the oven, fixing it as quickly as possible when there is a water leak in the bathroom, and then, sometimes or often, think about “taking care” of your relationship. Advice, sometimes pressure, disseminated on social networks, by coaches or the media, on the means to “prepare a moment of intimacy” for two, or even for a shared sexual relationship. One more task on the to-do list!

The mental load, exhausting on a daily basis

How to get out of the sexual mental burden? The guest for this episode is Flavie Taisne, sex therapist, author of Loving with all your body, published by Eyrolles.

In this interview, to be listened to above, Flavie Taisne firstly returns to what the mental load represents in a couple, and how it weighs more heavily on one of the partners, even if both can contribute to the tasks of the hearth.

“This notion of mental load, sometimes we sum it up to the list of things to do,” reports Flavie Taisne in this interview. But in fact, there is this notion of “I think about it constantly, it’s constantly in my head”, which is exhausting on a daily basis.

When sex becomes a task

The sex therapist then returns to the sexual mental load, which is similar to what has long been called “marital duty”, or the pressure, especially on women, to have a shared sexual relationship. “It’s like it’s a new box to check off on my to do list.” It is part of these injunctions (…) to have a fulfilled sexuality, to have frequent sexual relations. So, for some people, it will indeed add to this mental load. We come back to this old notion of marital duty. Today, it seems completely obsolete (…). It’s a notion that seems to have disappeared, but in fact, the phenomenon still exists, it’s just that we’re going to call it today sexual mental load. »

Rethink your intimate relationship

How to get out of this sexual mental burden? How to rethink the notion of intimacy in the couple? How to stop pressure and intrusive thoughts? All the answers from the sex therapist in this episode.

The “Everything SExplained” meeting is a weekly 20 Minutes podcast. You can listen to it for free on all apps and online listening platforms, like Apple podcast or Podcast addict for example.

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