Irish Town Finds Love the Old-Fashioned Way: A Journey Beyond Apps

Young people dance in The Matchmaker Bar during the Lisdoonvarna Matchmaking Festival in Lisdoonvarna, Ireland, on Sept. 27. The annual event, known as Europe’s biggest matchmaking festival, draws thousands seeking love, music and dancing.

Rob Stothard for NPR

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Rob Stothard for NPR

LISDOONVARNA, Ireland — Years ago, while traveling with my family along Ireland’s west coast, I spotted a curious billboard. It was blue and hot pink, and showed a man with shoulder-length hair and a gray beard smiling out from the roadside.

It was for a matchmaking festival — Europe’s largest, our tour guide assured us. The man in the photo was Willie Daly, the town’s resident matchmaker.

“Maybe any singles here can head to Lisdoonvarna next September to find your one true Irish love!” he declared as we drove past, earning the dull laugh for a line he had clearly delivered countless times before.

That was 15 years ago. Since then, dating has moved to apps and algorithms, to swipes and screens. But this September, I turned off the road and into the town itself to see what endures — and what has faded.

A sign advertises Willie Daly’s donkey farm and matchmaking museum on a road near Lisdoonvarna on Sept. 28.

Rob Stothard for NPR

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Lisdoonvarna, a village of fewer than 1,000 people, sits not far from the Cliffs of Moher, where the land falls into the Atlantic as if the world itself ends there. A single street, a scatter of pubs — and, for one month each year, a transformation as it becomes home to Europe’s last great matchmaking festival.

The tradition stretches back more than 150 years, when farmers came after the harvest to find wives. Today, thousands still descend. Some are chasing romance, others just the music and the jive. But beneath it all is something rare: an almost old-fashioned earnestness. People still come here to look one another in the eye.

At a crowded hotel bar, three women from County Kerry sit watching couples dance the Irish jive, an upbeat couples dance that resembles the Lindy Hop. Geraldine Beirne, Marie Walsh and Nora O’Sullivan say they’ve been coming since their 20s. Now in their 60s, they still return each year. No, not for men, they insist, but for the laughter, the music — and the company. That’s not to say they haven’t seen romance here before.

Geraldine Beirne, Nora O’Sullivan and Marie Walsh take a break from dancing in the Rathbaun Hotel during the Lisdoonvarna Matchmaking Festival on Sept. 27.

Rob Stothard for NPR

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“My sister met her husband here. My best friend met her husband here. I did meet somebody that was in my life for a while here,” says Walsh.

Back then, they even remember busloads of Americans rolling into town. That doesn’t happen anymore. “Since COVID, Lisdoonvarna’s had a big drop,” Beirne says. “The atmosphere, the whole scene changed. It has got quieter. But like that, when you’re good friends, you come out and you have a ball anyway.”

The three sound wistful. Yet across town, outside another bar, a younger crowd has gathered.

“I’m looking to find true love,” says 30-year-old Fearghal O’Sullivan, cradling a pint of beer in hand. He means it.

Festivalgoers Liam Shivers, Mike O’Mara and Fearghal O’Sullivan drink outside the Ritz Hotel during the Lisdoonvarna Matchmaking Festival.

Rob Stothard for NPR

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“You have no real connection with Tinder, you know?” adds his friend Liam Shivers. “I want to look a woman in her eyes when I first meet her. I really believe in love at first sight.”

Shivers pauses, laughs at himself. “I thought I had it once, but she said no. She said, ‘Stop looking at me.'”

Later, more friends will join them for Lisdoonvarna’s big Saturday blowout.

By evening, the Matchmaker Bar is almost at capacity. There’s live music, dancing, and in the corner, the star attraction — Willie Daly, the matchmaker himself.

He arrives to find a crowd already waiting for him. An old friend wants only to shake his hand. Three young women sit anxiously, one having dragged friends from Spain and Dublin in hopes of finding boyfriends. “I’m sick of them complaining,” she says.

Daly thinks he’s in his early 80s, though he isn’t sure (the town doctor wasn’t much with records).

Denise Almas, who is from Washington state in the U.S., meets matchmaker Willie Daly at Ireland’s Lisdoonvarna Matchmaking Festival.

Rob Stothard for NPR

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He sets up his booth in an alcove at the front of the bar. Once it had a door, but he took it off. “It was too private,” he says. “Took too long to listen to everyone’s story.”

Now, he tapes up signs that say things like “Love Won’t Wait” and spreads out his questionnaires. “What are your interests?” “What are your personal preferences for a partner?” Later, he’ll go through people’s responses and start making matches.

But first, he pulls out his most prized possession: a hundred-year-old ledger, passed down through three generations, bound in tape and rubber bands like some tattered spellbook.

“You don’t count the seconds,” he says, explaining the book’s magic. “You just touch the book. You think about happiness and love. Close your eyes and think about being happy and in love, and you’ll be in love and married inside the six Irish months.” Which, he admits, could mean anything from six days to six years.

Over the decades, Daly says he’s matched some 3,000 couples. “That never seemed many,” he shrugs.

His system of fees is equally vague. Sometimes 3 euros, sometimes 40, most often 5 ($5.86). “Five euros for a husband!” he shouts, laughing.

One by one, people sit with him. He listens, nods, then scribbles a word or two across their form: “Gorgeous.” “Intelligent.” Once, “Pamela Anderson.”

It is matchmaking, yes — but also ritual, theater, even confession. For many, just being heard is enough.

Béibhinn Moore meets matchmaker Willie Daly at the Lisdoonvarna Matchmaking Festival.

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Not everyone who sits with him is single. Laura Ryan, 37, has been with a partner for 15 years but never married. “I really only want a blessing,” she tells him. His advice? “Tell him you got a lot of offers.”

Daly admits his own marriage did not last. “I better touch wood,” he says. “You should never count what you have. They say you should never count your sheep, count your cows, count your pigs, count your money or count your wives.” Still, he beams when talking about his 20 grandchildren. His father introduced him to his wife, he says proudly.

Now, his granddaughter, 25-year-old Oonagh Tighe, is ready to carry the work on.

“First thing we say is, ‘Are you single?’ ‘Would you like a woman,’ ‘Would you like a man?’ ” she says. Tighe has already arranged her share of matches, including Patrick Mead and Angela Heavey, who met here two years ago. “She asked for our star signs,” Mead recalls. “She looked it up and said, you’re compatible. You’re a match.” They’re still together, celebrating their anniversary at the festival.

Others travel much farther. Denise Almas, from Vancouver, Wash., flew in after stumbling across the festival online. “I got off dating apps three years ago. Never again,” she says. “This is more normal. You’re live, in person. And we need more of this. We need more community in the U.S.”

Almas is not alone in that frustration. A 2025 Forbes Health poll found that 78% of dating app users in the U.S. reported frustration with them, citing ghosting, superficiality and a lack of real connection.

Melissa Condon dances at The Ritz Hotel during the Lisdoonvarna Matchmaking Festival.

Rob Stothard for NPR

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“Community is our culture,” says Melissa Condon, a farmer from Tipperary attending the festival with her husband. “It’s about meeting people, talking, telling stories.”

By midnight, the party has shifted to the Ritz Hotel.

Two dance floors are going at once. There’s a DJ on one side, a live band playing traditional Irish music on the other. Young and old, swirling together in the blur of it all. Not everyone — not even most — have found love. But the joy is in the gathering, and the earnest belief that they just might.

And then, just before the lights come up, Geraldine Beirne, one of the Kerry women who thought the festival’s best days were long gone, finds me in the crowd.

Seventeen years a widow, she is beaming. She says she just met a man.

“A gentleman,” she says, smiling. “With amazing blue eyes.”

Maybe, after all, it’s only the beginning.

People walk across the main road during the Lisdoonvarna Matchmaking Festival on Sept. 27.

Rob Stothard for NPR

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What cultural factors specific to Dingle might contribute to the success of traditional dating methods?

the Rise of ‘Analog’ Romance in Dingle, county Kerry

Dingle, a picturesque town on Ireland’s Dingle Peninsula, has become an unexpected hotspot for a growing trend: intentionally ditching dating apps and embracing traditional methods of finding love.while the world swipes left and right,residents of this vibrant community are rediscovering the charm – and effectiveness – of meeting partners through shared activities,local events,and good old-fashioned introductions. This shift away from online dating and towards real-life connections is gaining momentum, offering a refreshing choice in a digitally saturated world. The phenomenon is attracting attention from those seeking meaningful relationships and a break from the often superficial nature of app-based dating.

Why Dingle? A Unique Cultural Context

Several factors contribute to Dingle’s success as a haven for traditional dating.

* Strong Community Bonds: Dingle is a close-knit town where everyone knows everyone.This fosters a supportive habitat for introductions and encourages participation in local events.

* Emphasis on Social Interaction: Irish culture, particularly in smaller towns, traditionally prioritizes face-to-face interaction and social gatherings. Pubs, festivals, and community groups are central to social life.

* tourism & New Arrivals: While maintaining its strong local identity, Dingle also attracts a steady stream of tourists and newcomers, creating opportunities to meet people from diverse backgrounds. This influx contributes to a dynamic social scene.

* Disillusionment with Apps: A growing number of people are experiencing dating app fatigue and are actively seeking more authentic ways to connect.

how Dingle residents Are Finding Love Offline

The methods employed in Dingle aren’t revolutionary, but their intentionality is key. Here’s a breakdown of popular approaches:

* Joining Local clubs & Societies: From Gaelic football and hurling clubs to hiking groups and book clubs, shared interests provide a natural foundation for connection.

* Attending Festivals & Events: Dingle hosts numerous festivals throughout the year, including the Dingle Food Festival, Other Voices music festival, and the Dingle Regatta, offering ample opportunities to meet people.

* Volunteering: Contributing to the community through volunteering is a rewarding way to meet like-minded individuals.

* Taking Classes: Learning a new skill, whether it’s Irish language classes, pottery workshops, or cooking courses, provides a shared experience and a chance to connect with others.

* The Power of Introductions: Relying on friends and family for introductions remains a common practice. Blind dates,while sometimes daunting,can be surprisingly triumphant.

* simply Being Present: Regularly frequenting local pubs, cafes, and shops increases the chances of spontaneous encounters.

Benefits of Offline Dating: Beyond the Algorithm

Choosing offline dating offers several advantages over relying solely on dating apps:

* Authenticity: Meeting someone in person allows you to gauge their personality and chemistry more accurately.

* Deeper Connections: Shared experiences and genuine interactions foster stronger bonds.

* Reduced pressure: The absence of curated profiles and constant swiping can alleviate the pressure associated with online dating.

* Serendipity: Chance encounters can lead to unexpected and fulfilling relationships.

* Improved Social Skills: Engaging in face-to-face interactions enhances dialog and social skills.

Case Study: The Dingle Book club Romance

Local resident, Mary O’Connell, met her husband, Liam, through the Dingle Book Club. “We both loved reading Irish literature,” she explains. “The book club gave us a common ground to connect, and we gradually got to know each other through our discussions. It was a much more natural and organic way to build a relationship than anything I experienced on dating apps.” Their story is a testament to the power of shared interests and community-based dating.

Practical Tips for Embracing ‘Analog’ Romance

Inspired by Dingle’s success? Here’s how to apply these principles to your own life:

1. Identify Your Interests: What activities do you genuinely enjoy? Focus on pursuing those passions.
2. Get Involved: join local clubs, societies, or volunteer organizations that align with your interests.
3. Attend Local Events: Make an effort to attend festivals, concerts, and community gatherings.
4. Be Open to Introductions: Let your friends and family know you’re open to meeting new people.
5. Embrace Spontaneity: Be open to striking up conversations with people you encounter in your daily life.
6. Put your Phone Away: Be present in the moment and focus on connecting with the people around you. Mindful dating is key.
7. Prioritize Quality Over Quantity: Focus on building genuine connections with a few people rather than trying to meet as many as possible.

the future of Romance: A Balancing Act?

While Dingle’s approach represents a deliberate step back from the digital world, it’s unlikely that dating apps will disappear entirely. The