2023-12-19 12:33:36
Have you fallen in love with a person with an anxiety disorder and are wondering what to expect now? What an anxiety disorder is, how you can support those affected and what else you should pay attention to.
What is an anxiety disorder?
One in four people will experience an anxiety disorder sooner or later in their life. Ten to 14 percent of the population even have an anxiety disorder that requires treatment. So it’s not that unlikely that in the course of your dating life you’ll meet someone who has major problems keeping your own feelings of anxiety in check. Should this stop you from dating and flirting? No way! But it definitely makes sense for you to find out what exactly an anxiety disorder is so that you can be a little better prepared for what might come your way. You can also be a better support for your counterpart. In the end it can do it for you bring you closer together when you overcome difficult situations together!
Basically, the feeling of fear – as unpleasant as it can be – is nothing bad or even wrong. Anyone who feels fear, something strong Heart palpitations to racing, excessive sweating, shortness of breath, trembling hands and knees, is in Alert and can react super quickly if something threatening happens. Once the (supposed) dangerous situation is over, the fear also goes away. With an anxiety disorder, the fear remains and it also occurs in situations that, objectively speaking, are not worth fearing. In other words, even though you feel completely relaxed, your date may be experiencing terrible anxiety. According to the health insurance company AOK, around 9 percent of men and 21 percent of women in Germany suffer from an anxiety disorder within a year.
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What types of anxiety disorders are there?
There are many reasons why someone may develop an anxiety disorder, including one genetic predisposition. Parenting can also have an influence, for example if the parents were emotionally absent or if they were too protective of their child. Also dramatic experiences, such as a bad accident, the death of a loved one, job loss, a bad diagnosis or financial difficulties can promote an anxiety disorder. Basically, people are already attached to others mental illnesses suffer, also more susceptible to developing an anxiety disorder. These can be classified into three types:
- At a Phobia There is always a specific trigger for the fear reaction. For example, people can panic when they see a certain object (such as syringes) or an insect (spiders, of course!). Or they suffer from social phobia and have great difficulty speaking in front of a group of people, for example.
- For Panic disorder There is usually no specific trigger. So they can appear suddenly and for no apparent reason. If there is also a fear of places from which there is no easy exit (for example: elevator, bus or train), then you are still dealing with agoraphobia; the two anxiety disorders often occur together.
- At a generalized anxiety disorder You’re just constantly afraid – that something bad will happen to you or someone close to you. Inside you are constantly tense and worry is a constant companion.
How do I know if my date has an anxiety disorder?
The easiest thing would be to ask the person you are talking to whether he or she has an anxiety disorder. But if you’re still at it Beginning of your getting to know each other and you don’t have the courage to ask something like that yet, or if your date is perhaps dealing with his anxiety disorder not aware of it yourself these symptoms may also indicate this:
- Hyperventilating
- nausea
- tense muscles
- the inability to think clearly
- Difficulty expressing yourself clearly
- nightmares or insomnia
- Feelings of panic
- fidgetiness
These symptoms of an anxiety disorder do not necessarily occur all or at the same time. In addition, they can have different degrees of severity.
What is it like to date someone with anxiety disorders?
Imagine dating a person with whom you can’t go to certain places or events, who is constantly worried that nothing will happen with you or that you might break up soon. Sounds stressful, it probably is. But that doesn’t mean you can’t have a wonderful relationship once you meet adjusted to each other have! Furthermore, anxiety disorders do not make up the whole person and can be overcome. But it is true that people with mental illnesses have a harder time in their dating life. A study published in the journal “Evolutionary Psychological Science” says that they have fewer chances on the singles market than others.
How can you support a partner with anxiety disorders?
If the person you are talking to is becoming afraid or panicking for no apparent reason, then it can be super difficult understanding to react: After all, everything is okay for you and you can’t know what’s going on in your date’s or partner’s head. What you no way should do in such a situation? Something like “Calm down” or “Come down, nothing’s wrong!” say. Empathy is the magic word! This also helps:
1. Reality-Check
Your partner keeps canceling plans, doesn’t want to go to parties or bombards you with messages when you’re out and about? He or she doesn’t do that bad intention, egoism or because he or she likes you manipulate but to avoid difficult situations. Always remember this before you get disappointed or angry.
2. Try not to judge
When someone tells you about their fears, it takes a lot of effort from the other person. The stupidest thing you can do right now is this Fears as absurd to represent. Try to resist the impulse to try to explain why his fear is unfounded. Instead, practice simply listening and neutral-interested inquiries to ask: Instead of saying “Oh, that’s nonsense!”, ask instead, “I don’t understand your concern, can you tell me more about it?”. You should be the one Safe Space for your date or partner where he or she doesn’t have to worry about being judged for something they feel.
3. Learn what triggers him or her
Some sufferers of anxiety disorders panic about birds, others about dogs, some about scissors, others about drills, some about crowds of people, others about confined spaces. If you understand what’s going on with your date trigger feelings of fear can, then it will not only help him or her, but also yourself, because it will be easier for you to understand and you can avoid such trigger moments together.
4. Say something that helps
Sometimes it doesn’t take much more than telling the other person “I’m at your side” to pick him or her up in this situation. Other phrases that your date feel good are: “I’m listening to you”, “I know this is all a lot for you right now”, “Should I sit with you?”, “Can I do something to help you?”.
What can help you and your partner?
There is no question: mental illness always means an additional stress factor in a relationship. But which relationship is stress-free and which person is so mentally stable that they never have to deal with problems? If both partners learn to deal with an anxiety disorder – the affected person, as well as the indirectly affected part – then you can still have a happy relationship. You can think about whether it makes sense for you to get support in the form of a therapy pick up. Perhaps there are also groups in which relatives of people with anxiety disorders can discuss how they are coping? In any case, you are not alone with the challenges, and it’s good to keep reminding yourself of that.
But don’t try yours Wrap your partner in cotton wool and to think that you shouldn’t put any additional “burden” on him or her with your very own problems. You still have a partnership in which your issues are important and in which you should also feel comfortable and safe. After all, you are not a therapist and you cannot and should not do something like that. If he or she is not already in treatment, you can definitely encourage him or her to do so.
Conclusion: How to date someone with anxiety disorder
Saying “I like spending time with you” can ease your date’s fear that he or she will lose you. “I’m 15 minutes late” takes away the worry that something has happened to you. Dating people with anxiety disorders means above all else to be more careful when dealing with one another and become aware what your own words and actions trigger in others could. This can be tiring because you have to think more, but it can also bring two people closer together, after all, they care about and for each other. And that also means that you should take care of yourself: If you are overwhelmed, then that is okay and it just means that you should seek the help you need to be there for yourself and your partner to be able to.
If you need help, you can find support from the nationwide Telephone counseling at: 0800 / 111 0 111 and 0800 / 111 0 222. Alternatively, you can also send an email to online.telefonseelsorge.de write.
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