Writer Yiyun Li, a Princeton University professor and Pulitzer Prize winner, is navigating the profound psychological aftermath of losing both her teenage sons to suicide. In a recent discussion regarding her latest novel, Music Against the Night, Li explains how she processes these losses, rejecting the term “grief” in favor of an “abyss” where she expects to remain for the rest of her life.
Li’s sons, Vincent and James, died six years apart—Vincent in 2017 at age 16, and James in 2024 at age 19. Her 2025 memoir, Things in Nature Merely Grow, documented her experience following these tragedies. Reflecting on her path forward, Li says, James’ death taught me to suffer better. To say, ‘I can do it, and I can live with my pain and sorrow without ever wanting to stop feeling.’
Finding Meaning in Music
Li’s new novel explores the lives of two prodigies in the 18th and 19th centuries, a subject she chose because it centers on music, a medium she believes exists outside the limitations of language. I think I’ve had the feeling both times after my children’s death that words often fall short, and falling short doesn’t mean not succeeding, falling short doesn’t mean failing,
she states. But when I start a new project, I would like a subject [where] words naturally fall short. So music is that choice.
Beyond her writing, Li began taking piano lessons in late 2023. She found that the discipline of music helped her navigate the time following James’ death in February 2024. Piano or music is a good way for me to count time — because music is about time,
she says. It’s about counting the measure, counting the rhythm.
The Experience of Parenting Prodigies
Li describes both of her sons as exceptionally gifted. She recalls James as being extraordinarily odd and brilliant,
noting that he perceived the world differently from adults from a young age. Similarly, she remembers Vincent as a brilliant painter and an oboist. Regarding the challenges of raising such children, Li notes that while some might have expected them to follow paths toward becoming figures like Einstein, her goal was simply for them to have a normal, happy boy living in an ordinary life.
For those struggling with similar circumstances, Li views her piano practice as a way to remain connected to the world. I’m not a concert pianist, but somehow I find it liberating and healthy to do something that you absolutely love but cannot do well,
she says. I think that’s, again, acknowledging the limit of my capacity.
If you or someone you know may be considering suicide or is in crisis, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.
