Be honest – haven’t you called in sick before, even though you were actually only suffering from an acute lack of interest? So that means: feign the flu and call in sick because that’s the easiest thing, isn’t it? But what’s the best way to do it without getting into trouble? We’ve listed six tricks for you that you don’t even have to try because your:e boss:in has known them for a long time anyway.
Fake flu in times of Corona?
Since Corona, it has also become much easier to write in sick over the phone to let. At the moment the Covid-19 quarantine rules state that a quarantine in case of possible infection applies to contacts and anyone who suspects that they have contracted the coronavirus. A federal quarantine recommendation readsthat you should stay at home if possible. So you can just say you’ve been in contact with someone who tested positive. Now, of course, it should be clear that your:e boss:in has probably heard this excuse 100 times.
Faking the flu: is it possible without a doctor?
If you don’t want to go to work, you don’t want to go to the doctor to get sick leave. That is only too understandable. Even if most doctors recognize very well, whether you are really sick or not they will usually just let you take sick leave without asking too many questions. Of course, a proper sick note is the easiest way to be nice to your bosses.
Simulate illness: These are the basics
People who are ill generally behave a little differently than when they are healthy. Feigning an illness is therefore always associated with acting. These are classic symptoms that everyone knows:
- Directly when greeting, you should avoid shaking hands and deal with the words “I do not want to infect you” introduce.
- A distressed look always helps.
- To clear your throat in between and massage your temples
Simulate illness for advanced users
Most bosses are already fairly familiar with the typical little tricks. You can no longer impress anyone with these small symptoms of illness. What you actually want is that your:e boss:in himself condemns you from working and tells you that you should only hang out there again when you are fully recovered. We found these tips. We cannot (and do not want to) guarantee that this actually works…
- Sneeze: If you want to convince your:e boss:in on the phone about your illness, sprinkle a little pepper on your clothes beforehand. You sniff it while you’re on the phone. Then you definitely have to sneeze.
- Watery Eyes: You can get watery eyes by rubbing a little hot (peppermint) toothpaste under your eyes. But be careful not to catch it directly. Tiger balm on the back of your hand also works if you wave it around close to your face.
- Paleness: Don’t just smack bright makeup on your face to simulate sallow skin. You can see that immediately. Better take a dark green eyeshadow and carefully apply it UNDER your eyes. Your skin will appear lighter and paler compared to the dark shadows under your eyes.
- medicine cabinet: If your boss walks by your desk and sees your entire medicine chest spread out over it, he/she is probably already speaking to you without you having to say anything.
- Whisper: If you come to work in the morning and only whisper from the start because your voice is “gone”, it’s also possible that you’ll be sent home right away. In many professions, the voice is existential.
- Crumpled tissues: When you’re in the office, your desk should also look like you’re sick. Crumpled handkerchiefs, a large cup of tea and the medicine cabinet mentioned above do the rest.
As already mentioned, these tips are of course not meant to be taken seriously and are only made for an absolute exception. As a rule, you should not play with illnesses, because lies have short legs and, on the whole, you should enjoy going to work.