Almost a year ago we divorced after more than two years of living together. We had a sweet, happy, happy month until I found out that he was texting and going back and forth with a new employee at the company. Of course, he denied, saying he was just teasing her for fun.
Since there’s no clear evidence, I don’t make a big deal out of it. But since then I have developed the habit of always trying to check his phone.
Once he caught me searching for the phone password. He said I didn’t trust him, didn’t respect his privacy. I think the fact that he constantly changes his phone password and gets angry when I touch his phone proves that he “has a habit of startling”.
Words back and forth, he slapped me. This action really shocked me. He wasn’t that kind of brute. Or maybe he was good at hiding it, but now he’s revealed it.
After that slap, we got mad at each other. He said that because I was wrong, he still had a lot of words, and I of course had nothing more to say. In those stressful and suffocating days, I naturally thought that we were lucky we didn’t have children, maybe we could get a quick divorce. At that time, I heard some news that came to me to see him taking the new employee to lunch. As more reason to motivate the breakup, I wrote the divorce papers.
My husband at that time was probably feeling excited about the new relationship, so he held on awkwardly and agreed to sign the application. The marriage ended so quickly that I was the one who took the initiative, but I also felt incredibly disappointed.
It wouldn’t be worth mentioning if nothing happened, a few weeks after the divorce I found out I was pregnant. For the past few months, because of family problems, I have not noticed that I do not “see the month”. Faced with this irony situation, I don’t know whether to be happy or sad. I used to really want to be a mother, but not in this situation. Well, she’s here, I have no choice but to try to give her the best life I can.
Once I ran into my ex-husband by chance. Seeing my belly bulging behind my thin skirt, he was surprised. We recently divorced and my stomach is already clear, he is smart enough to realize that he is the father of the baby, even though he asked and I did not admit it.
Since that day, he always finds a way to meet me, texting and calling to remind me of old stories. He said we were in a hurry and it was a mistake. He hopes the two can heal to welcome the birth of their child and give them a full and happy life.
He diligently came to my house, bringing both milk for pregnant women, vitamins and fruits for me to nourish. I found him to be sincere, also a little moved. Anyway, we used to love each other, used to live happily. Perhaps both you and I were too hasty, with the things that happened, instead of finding a way to fix it, we chose the faster way, which is to knock it down. In life, who has never made mistakes. In a marriage, there is no such thing as a completely peaceful couple without turbulence. Thinking that, my heart fluttered a little.
I asked my mother if I should remarry my ex-husband, at least because the baby was about to be born. These days he seems to know his fault. He also genuinely cares about me and my mother. And more importantly, I want my child to be born into a family with enough parents. His expressions have been seen by my mother over the past time. I think any mother would be supportive.
But my mother’s thinking is not the same as mine. After hearing my question, my mother said:
– “Marriage is your choice, divorce is also your choice. If you want to remarry now, of course it’s your right, I don’t support it, nor stop it. I just want to tell you that, no always a child living in a family full of parents is also happy.
The important thing is not enough parents but important how parents live together, really love, really happy. Remember why you and him divorced. If he was really as good as you say he wouldn’t have become your ex-husband.”
I was just thinking about the future, seemingly forgetting the past for a moment, forgetting the reason why me and him broke up. It was him playing with flowers and butterflies, he used violence against me. Even when I proposed a divorce, he didn’t even bother to hold on. If I don’t get pregnant, will he want to come back? He wants to heal for the child, so where is my place?
The more I think about it, the more I understand the problem. Our marriage fell apart, maybe he was wrong, and I wasn’t quite right either. But I can’t fall twice in the same hole. Maybe my mother is right, something old means old. If he was really good, he wouldn’t have become my ex-husband.