Dice Robert Waldingerdirector of largest study on human happiness that has been done to date, than meeting in person many of the more than 700 participants of the investigation has led to some of the happiest moments of this work. “It has been wonderful -he explains- to be able to talk to so many people about their lives or spend hours reading thousands of papers that tell the stories of so many families”. During eight decadeshe Harvard Study of Adult Development (HSAD) has followed the evolution of more than 700 young people -60 of whom are still alive- to analyze the factors that determine the level of happiness of the human being. The research was presented worldwide in January. The book A good life (Editorial Planeta), has been translated into more than 50 languages and tries to answer a very simple question:What makes a life happy? What is the key to a good life? He result has been revealing: “Where is the secret? In the personal relationships that we establish with the people around us: “the better and stronger they are, the longer and happier we will live”. He professor Waldinger has visited Spain this week and we have talked to him.
After more than 80 years studying the happiness of hundreds of people, was such a result expected?
No way. At first it was not hard to believe the data that the investigations showed us. However, we found that many other researchers had obtained the same results as us: that the human relations are very important to our health. I think everyone knows that relationships are key to life but until now it has not been so clearly seen that they are also very important for our health.
Human relationships protect us from stress
Stress damages the body and relationships protect us from stress.
In short, we cannot do without personal relationships if we want to be happy. Is it objective?
The data shows that there is a very strong link between the social relationships and health. As there are many studies that support this conclusion, we can say that it is a scientific truth.
how does that work give and take personal relationships-health?
The starting hypothesis is that the stress is part of our life, that is, we live exposed to many stressors daily. When we get stressed, our body goes into fight flight mode: the heart races, the blood flows to the muscles, ect. After overcoming the challenge the body returns to its equilibrium state. Social relationships help us return to that state of balance. Studies show that in the states of soledadthis help is not presented and the levels of stress hormones is maintained and the levels of inflammation are higher, affecting many body systems such as the sistema cardiovascular, joints, etc. We believe that stress damages the body and the relationships protect us from stress.
You say that loneliness can even kill us…
Yes, it can kill. There are many more suicides among people who live in solitude. Besides, the soledad and social isolation are stressors.
online relationships will never be a substitute for interpersonal ones
Relationships through social networks never work as a replacement for interpersonal relationships where human contact and real life prevail.
What place do relationships occupy through screens in that state of health and balance?
Today, it is very important how we use the screens to contribute to our well-being. When we use the social networks to actively connect with other people, well-being goes up. When we do it just to consume content, the levels of depression and anxiety go up, same as self esteem problems. In addition, it must be said that we know that relationships through social networks never work as a replacement for interpersonal relationships where the human contact and real life.
What characterizes a quality relationship?
It is a relationship in which we can be ourselvesWe don’t have to hide part of who we are. Are reciprocal and authentic relationships. Relationships we can feel safe.
The study originally included more than 700 men. Later it incorporated women. Were women from before happier or more unhappy?
We know that the expectations They play a very important role in this matter. In fact, at one point we thought that the women of the first generation studied (approximately 70 years ago) would be unhappy women because they lived a very bored as housewivesHowever, it was not, They were happy. Because? We attribute it to expectations. The same is not the case with current generations. The differences between the happiness of men and women It depends a lot on the generation.
Women are much better than men at taking care of their relationships.
What do you recommend to improve our personal relationships?
I recommend two strategies. One, to create new relationships. It is easier when we are part of a club or a group. and another, for maintain the relationships we already have. In this sense it is important be active making plans with friends, relatives without leaving things to chance. And the women they are much better at doing this than men.
Robert Waldinger is Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and co-author of the book “The Good Life” (Editorial Planeta).
Robert Waldinger es Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical Schooldirector of the Center for Psychodynamic Therapy and Research of the Hospital General de Massachusetts and director of Harvard Study of Adult Development. He has published numerous scientific studies and two academic books. Is psychiatrist and psychoanalyst. His TED talk “What makes a good life” has been viewed more than 42 million times and is one of ten TED talks most views ever.