2023-10-17 21:13:38
Introduction to the series of articles
Parents learn from their heartsIt aims to help the public better understand and interpret the worries and troubles in their parents’ hearts. The series of articles will explore topics such as physiological aging, psychology, emotional support and spiritual needs of the elderly through various situations in life, and provide practical suggestions and possible solutions.
I am not a psychologist. If you have any professional questions, please remember to seek expert consultation~
Key takeaways
Most of us will pay attention to whether the physical diseases of our elders are treated by doctors and controlled by taking medication.It is easy to ignore the emotional changes of elders.
Methods to persuade elders to seek medical treatment: first see a family doctor, accompany relatives and friends to see a doctor, not to treat “depression”, but to adjust “brain endocrine”
“Hey, Mom, why didn’t you go out today? Didn’t you go singing with your friends on Tuesday?”
“Hey, everyone gets tired of singing those songs every time and doesn’t want to go.”
“Yeah… I just want to go out to buy something. Do you want to go to the department store with me? It’s been a while since we went together~”
“No, my feet are sore and my knees hurt after just walking a few steps.”
“Then…should we go out for dinner with your Jin Sun tonight? There is a new restaurant nearby, I can try it…”
“No need, you can just go. If you feel tired just thinking about going out, I can just stay at home!”
After my mother finished speaking, she went into the room… I just had my annual physical examination last month, and the report data looked normal. However, recently, I have become easily impatient and dissatisfied with things, which is very different from before. The mother who enjoys singing with friends and often runs outside seems to be two people.
Have you ever experienced this situation personally?
Sometimes, when we don’t live with our parents, we go home for a long time and try our best to show our filial piety, but are rejected when we enter.
What on earth is going on? ?
The irritability of the aging process
After 20 minutes of experience, I was completely frustrated and even gave up on completing several specified actions.
I just did an aging experience at school last week. The experiencer needs to wear special lenses, earmuffs, gloves, sandbags tied to the hands and feet, and a device that prevents the back from straightening. Then, I was assigned to complete a series of behavioral actions, including walking up and down stairs, writing a first-diagnosis form, counting change, reading a newspaper, pouring water, buttoning a shirt… In addition, there were other members of the same group who each acted as “urges”. “helper” and “helper”.
Tell the result directly:
The entire aging experience lasted about 20 minutes. I managed to get full of frustration and pain in execution, and even gave up on completing several specified actions.
I only buttoned two buttons on my shirt because the buttons were too small and difficult to fit into the holes, and the buttons on the shirt closer to my neck couldn’t be seen clearly and couldn’t be buttoned.
When counting the change, I couldn’t put the change in my palm and sort it one by one. I simply scattered the change on the table and pushed the categories with my fingers. When the change was collected, I would put it all to the edge of the table, collect it and push it to the other palm. .
Not to mention having to check off those initial consultation forms with tiny fonts…
These physical limitations, such as poor eyesight, joint stiffness, and poor finger flexibility, directly affect my mental state, from a little sense of frustration to the beginning of inner self-blame (in my heart OS: Oh my god , How come I can’t even do this?), and in the end I felt irritated and impatient and gave up directly.
“Uh… I can’t see, and the buttons are so hard to button. Can I just button two buttons?”
“Forget it, this is so troublesome, I don’t want to do it anymore!”
If these words begin to appear among the elders or parents around you, please give them more time, tolerance and verbal encouragement, because most elders will not directly say that they are “in a bad mood”, and many people still express their “bad mood”. There are many negative thoughts about “aging”, and the inability to accept that aging is a natural and multi-faceted process has led to a mentality of fear and even discrimination.
Remember to be aware of yourself at all times and don’t rush or put more pressure (my team members role-played very well XD). Because when the elderly begin to give up trying to complete these behaviors now, it also means that their ability to take care of themselves will deteriorate more quickly in the future.
old age depression
In fact, a certain proportion of the elderly will suffer from depression when they enter old age. There are various reasons why the elderly suffer from depression, sometimes including genetic inheritance, changes in brain tissue state, nerve cell conduction, psychological conditions, social pressure, etc. Various factors interact with each other.
Many medical studies have pointed out that chronic diseases, chronic pain, physical disability, etc. are closely related to depression in old age.Most of us will pay attention to whether the physical diseases of our elders are treated by doctors and controlled by taking medication, but it is easier to ignore the emotional changes of our elders.。
Therefore, pay more attention to the psychological status of the elderly. If the situation described at the beginning of the article occurs frequently, or if you have the following obvious symptoms (you can use the information provided by Dong FoundationThe amount of depression among Taiwanese people in old ageform for testing), it is recommended to take the elder to seek medical treatment – psychiatry and receive professional treatment.
Depressive mood for more than two weeks or combined with anxiety disorder, hypochondriasis, etc. There are obvious changes in the following, such as diet, weight, sleep, interpersonal social interaction, etc. Grief reactions to the loss of a loved one over a year. Feelings of apparent helplessness, hopelessness, uselessness, or guilt. Suicidal thoughts or attempts. Elderly patients with alcohol or drug addiction. Certain diseases such as stroke and cancer can cause depression.
If your elders are opposed to seeing a psychiatrist, the book “Keep Saying I Feel Uncomfortable, But Don’t Go to the Doctor” written by Dr. Cai Jiafen also mentions several methods and ideas that you can try:
How to seek medical treatment: See a family doctor first
Sometimes patients with depression will suffer from poor appetite and weight loss. If these problems are bothering you first, it is recommended that the elders first see a doctor in the “Family Medicine Department”.
Remember to make arrangements with the family physician first when accompanying a doctor to let the doctor know that the patient may need psychiatric treatment. Then during the consultation, it was explained that further interdisciplinary examination was needed and he was asked to go to the psychiatric department for treatment.
Medical advice: Accompany relatives and friends to see a doctor
Sometimes elders think that seeing a psychiatrist is a serious matter and refuse to seek medical treatment. At this time, you can ask relatives and friends for help, express that you have similar sleep and emotional problems with them, and ask your elders to accompany your relatives and friends to see the patient.
When entering the clinic, first let the doctor conduct a consultation with relatives and friends, and ask the relatives and friends to use their own names to actually explain the symptoms of the elders. This will also help the elders to relieve their tension and defensiveness. Finally, let’s encourage the elders: “Since you are here, just take a look.”
Medical explanation: It’s not about treating “depression”, it’s about adjusting “brain endocrine system”
Elders sometimes have their own insistence and interpretation on some medical terms and diseases. Therefore, when persuading for medical treatment, you can try to use concepts and statements that are acceptable to them under the general principle of not lying.
For example, some elders cannot accept that they have “depression”, but they can accept that they have “brain degeneration, causing emotional disorders” and therefore receive treatment. Or sometimes they cannot accept taking “anti-depressant” medicine, but if it is to adjust the endocrine relationship in the brain, they can accept taking the medicine.
Finally, I would like to quote the World Health Organization (WHO) definition of health:Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social peace for the people of a country(state of complete physical, mental and social well-being), therefore, health not only refers to the physical phenomenon without disease or weakness, but of course it is not limited to health in the physiological category.
We hope that our society can view psychiatry and conduct psychological consultations with a more open and equal attitude, and also take mental health more seriously.
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