Dealing with an Overbearing Mother-in-Law: A Newlywed’s Struggle

2024-01-22 15:28:00

I recently married Misha. We have a wonderful marriage, we are very happy. My husband is one of the few with whom I have complete mutual understanding. The only negative is his mother, my mother-in-law.

From the first time we met, I realized that she was overprotective of her own son. She loves taking care of her child too much, who, for a moment, is already twenty-seven years old. At this age, this is no longer a concern, but an attempt to get your nose into something where a person clearly does not belong.

At first, I had no plans to discuss this issue and took a wait-and-see approach. You never know, it suddenly seemed to me. And turning a newly-made husband against his own mother is not the best idea. But lately my mother-in-law has become more and more intrusive.

For example, we recently invited her to lunch and she came with her own groceries. She filled our refrigerator with all sorts of jars and bottles, vegetables and slices.

– Yes, I decided to help you, but as I see, you eat all sorts of nonsense. And now you will cook from natural products, they are not so expensive, and tasty, and healthy. I already understand this, I’ve been standing behind the stove for decades,” Maria Petrovna assured.

Well, I have plenty of experience. And anyway, why did she bring all this without asking? She discredits me as a housewife in the eyes of my husband! She also said that we somehow eat wrong and prepare food from the wrong things.

Well, okay, I thought, suddenly she wanted the best. I just phrased it wrong. She probably wanted to help us and treat us to her favorite foods. And I had already mentally unleashed all the dogs on her.

But a couple of days after that incident we went to visit her. We talked about our plans and said that in a couple of months we were planning to go on vacation to Thailand.

– What kind of Thailand do you like? Your apartment is falling apart and needs repairs. How can you think about any trips when you are ashamed to invite guests to your home? Yes, in our time there was no such chaos – the mother-in-law started up.

– Maria Petrovna, we are separately collecting money for repairs. Well, now, don’t rest for a few years or what? We have been dreaming about this trip for a long time. Moreover, we didn’t have a honeymoon,” I answered calmly.

I was immediately confused by the fact that Misha did not answer his mother in any way to her accusations. For some reason I argued with her. We, of course, quickly closed this topic and moved on to another. But still, I would like my husband to defend our joint decision.

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And a couple of days ago, some kind of circus happened. Misha talked to his mother on the phone, and then came to me with the news.

“I was talking to my mother just now and said that we are going to go get your sheepskin coat today.” She says she has some good one there, she never wore it at all. And the quality seems okay. I’m ready to give it away, he says, why waste extra money when you have something to wear,” my husband relayed the conversation with his mother-in-law.

– And what did you answer her? – I started to get irritated.

– So what? Mom is telling the truth. If there really is a good thing there, then why throw money away. Now sheepskin coats are quite expensive. Let’s at least go to mom and try it on,” he suggested.

– Yes, Mish. “I couldn’t even imagine that I married a mama’s boy,” I told him.

Not only does my mother-in-law care about the contents of our refrigerator and the distribution of our budget, but now she wants to shove old things from her closet at me!

So that her son does not spend an extra penny on his wife. She’s simply counting our money. But the saddest thing is that my husband doesn’t seem to mind any of this!

In vain he tried to find out what I meant by “mama’s boy” and get me to talk. I was in no mood to explain obvious things to him. I just said that we weren’t going anywhere, and we haven’t spoken for two days.

The section “Readers’ Opinions” publishes materials from readers.

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